“distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own opinion. Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.”
Romans 12:13-18 NKJV
Relationships are a part of all of our lives. Some of them may be healthy, while others aren’t. At times, we may feel closer to people that we’re not related to, and feel distant from those in our own families.
Within these relationships, we get to witness the good in the lives of people we love, but we also have to navigate the difficult—like hurt, betrayal, and frustration (to name a few)
.
And the
normal
way many people respond when these things happen is to withhold forgiveness, seek revenge, and show no mercy.
When someone does something that hurts or offends us, we often take it as a personal attack. We assume they meant to hurt us, and at times, people do. But, for the most part, we’re just imperfect people who are just being...
imperfect
.
In addition to how people treat us, we need to examine how we handle relationships on our end. Do we build people up with our words, or do we tear them down? Are we kinder to people who can do something for us in return, or do we treat everyone with honor and respect? Do we typically give ourselves sexually to everyone we date, or are we saving ourselves for our future spouse?
The Apostle Paul shares very specific instructions in Romans 12:9-18 about how we should operate in our relationships. He says we’re called to love each other as brothers and sisters, honor one another beyond what we’d give ourselves, share with others who are in need, and possibly the hardest part...not repay with evil when someone wounds us.
When it comes to our relationships, let’s look at the contrasting ideas we find in what’s accepted as normal and what could be
better than normal
:
Normal abandons friendships when mistakes are made, but
better than normal
forgives.
Normal allows insignificant issues to create frustration, but
better than normal
is patient.
Normal gives in to temptation, but
better than normal
chooses purity.
Normal argues when there are differences, but
better than normal
builds bridges.
Normal looks out for self, but
better than normal
thinks of others.
Normal makes jokes at others’ expense, but
better than normal
speaks with respect.
Whether our relationships are struggling or not, we know that normal isn’t always a healthy place to be, but it’s more comfortable to us than the unknown. So, let’s choose to be better than normal in how we love and live with the people around us.
Do you have relationships in your life that are unhealthy? Think through the people in your life and how you interact with them. Decide what is healthy and what needs to change to ensure your relationships are honoring to God.
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