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Writer's picturePhil Wade

Vital signs- Monday, September 13th, 2021


Help Each Other Grow

One of the marks of awesome relationships is that you help each other grow.

There are two methods that help people grow and two that don’t. 

Here’s how you help each other:

Grow through example. Jesus did this in teaching his disciples. John 13:14-15 says, “Since I . . . have washed your feet, you ought to wash each other’s feet. I have given you an example to follow. Do as I have done to you” (NLT). People don’t want to hear a sermon. They want to see an example of Jesus in your life.

Grow through conversations. In order to grow in relationships, you should have critical conversations about real issues. Dedicate time to having conversations around the things that really matter in life. 

Two ways that don’t help people: 

Criticism won’t help someone grow. Nagging doesn’t work. Condemning doesn’t work. Criticizing and complaining are totally ineffective in helping a person grow. Why? Because when you criticize, you’re focusing on what you don’t want rather than what you do want. 

Comparing won’t help someone grow. Everybody’s unique. Nobody in the world is like you! That’s why comparing never, ever works. In fact, it’s lethal to any relationship. The Bible says, “Each person should judge his own actions and not compare himself with others. Then he can be proud for what he himself has done” (Galatians 6:4 NCV).

The Bible says, “Love one another.” “Care for one another.” “Pray for one another.” “Encourage one another.” “Help one another.” “Counsel one another.” “Support one another.” These kinds of statements go on and on. In the New Testament, we’re told to “build each other up, just as in fact [we] are doing” (1 Thessalonians 5:11 NIV). That’s the way God meant for it to be.


Think about the conversations you’ve had recently. How much time did you spend talking about things that really matter in life?

What are ways you can be an example of Jesus to others?

Instead of comparing or criticizing, how can you build up the people in your life?

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